Monday

I walked outside today and breathed in the rain hanging.  
Smelled like Spring for the first time even though it's been official for almost a month.
I walked outside today and turned my head, that brave neck stiff from sleeping.


I like sleeping so much lately.  It's cause I'm scared.


In my dream we were in a big hotel-- all of us, and mostly strangers-- i hung from the ceiling, it was covered with fun things, i grabbed at them.  I was lost in elevators.  Late and wandering deep carpets.


After yoga this evening, my neck still stiff, but now aware of the other tension in my body, and the breath of the "who-am-I? Don't know" which makes me want to laugh, as real things often do.  I took a wrong turn and drove slowly through a street marked "farming community."  The rain was still hanging.  I stopped in a cemetery, found a nice round tree and sat beneath it.  The headstone in front of it-- a freemason and his wife-- he died the day I was born.


I come back to this house where today a strange man lingered in the backyard.
He saw me see him through the blinds.  I come back to this house where I hide in this box that lights up from within.  Is it cause I'm scared?  
I roll my neck back and forth.
There are stacks of boxes.
It should be easy.
The rain hangs.