it seems

that there is something to say but all the words are not enough.

life is stuck in my neck again.
i have the tools but some of them are down the street,
like the grapefruit.  substitution:  beer,
and your electric bill works fine instead of a notebook.
the stairs are cold but my body warms from the inside.
the sky is white today, thank god.  thank god it's white, i couldn't bear
any more brightness.

someone changed the time.
cold water and so many things to know.  i just want to take
pictures.  i feel way too
serious; it's supposed to be
fun, even though the world is
terrible; we have hands to
clutch in the dark, we have eyes to
prove to each other what came before,
what's always been, what grows
and bends.

every little sound seems so loud.
i break and bend.  my eyes are sharp.
without my glasses your skin is all i'd ever need to look at;
i would never get bored.

how can there be too much--
how can there not be enough--

maybe i will lock myself
in a tiny room
and practice unclenching my jaw
and maybe, warm in the dark,
eventually i'll fall back to sleep